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Cheezburger Company Blog
Chuck Norris could use my pets to kill me? Wow.
You would be suprised with what Chuck Norris can kill you with.
One or two Chuck Norris jokes could do the trick.
Chuck Norris could kill me with a Chuck Norris joke about Chuck Norris killing me? Recursive win.
He could kill you with the room it self.
I think there’s a mistake in this graph. The diagram states that chuck norris could kill you with anything found in your living room EXCEPT pets, pet stuff, people, furniture, electronics, and other objects. That “other objects” category should include everything else, meaning that the set “things in a living room that chuck norris could use to kill you” is EMPTY according to this graph. This is clearly a mistake, and I suggest the following corrections. First, to achieve the desired effect, “Other Objects” should go where “Things Chuck Norris could use to kill you” is now. Then, a new bubble should be created around the ENTIRE GRAPH, leading to the following hierarchy:
Things Chuck Norris could use to kill you > things in a living room > various objects.
But even that’s not right, because some people aren’t in the living room, but Chuck Norris could still use them to kill you.
The joke is good, but the graph is all wrong and the funny was lost on me because my first reaction was “But Chuck Norris CAN kill people with electronics!”
I have created a “Proper use of Venn Diagrams” version of this joke here:
http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=3168473
You are talking crap. The ‘Things Chuck Norris could use to kill you set’ clearly includes all the other sets shown on the diagram (which incidentally is an Euler diagram, not a Venn diagram).
lose.
Oui, très drôle, désolé, Je ne parle pas anglais. Français orateurs, vous savez ce que je dis. Je suis d’une région francophone du Québec. Quelqu’un d’autre est un de mes voisins?
“fail” fail
…maybe.
GraphJam is serious business!
stop breathing now
Dude…you need a life.
And you might want to include getting laid.
Or do I need to make you a “Things You Need to Let Go of” diagram?
what a dumbass… p.s. your version is a little off… it could use some changes.
STFU GTFO KTHBAI.
the graph makes perfect sense you just cant read graphs properly…idiot.lol
FAIL.
he could use the room itself
IT ISN’T F$&KING FUNNY. STOP IT.
Actually this is funnier than 90% of the “demonstrating the obvious” graphs we see here
Amen to that.
and actually, this wasn’t an annoyingly obvious Norris joke, I think in terms of annoying internet memes, this graph did pretty well
Are you suggesting that Chuck Norris would need a weapon?
just for the sake of entertainment.
“could” use to kill you.
I never realized what Graph Jam has been lacking until now. MOAR CHUCK NORRIS PLOX!
Yes, because that would somehow make it. . . funnier?
…yes?
Wow, this is the most awe–ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
This belongs in 2006.
No, m0re like 1776
XD I loled
The list of items most definitely misses “the living room”.
Nick isn’t old enough to get it either, methinks. Kudos! Good entry!
No, Nick realizes that Chuck Norris jokes stopped being funny a few years ago.
Namely, fifteen years before they got started. Seriously.
Anyone who mentions Chuck Norris should GET A LIFE GOD*cuss* IT!!
Could Chuck kill me with Air?
According to what he can use to kill people in the jokes, he could kill you with a single molecule or atom of anything in the atmosphere; they just haven’t figured out a way to make that “funny” yet.
He can kill you with waves too. Don’t look in his eyes.
I think “pet stuff” should encompass more of the things in this graph.
Yep, I once nearly choked myself with a cat toy. Don’t ask.
Why all the Norris hate? It’s not necessary… nevermind that it’s hazardous to your health… >.>
Ninja can make weapon out of anything. That includes your own nose.
Ahh, but Chuck Norris could make weapon out of all that, and Ninja.
Chuck Norris jokes are pretty last year.
Chuck Norris jokes are way out dated. But what do you expect from teenagers. Get some new jokes.
I think Nick has been around long enough to be tired of how lame the chuck norris meme is.
There should be a little bit of overlap between the “People” and “Pets” sets.
And a strong overlap between pet’s stuff and furniture
And a separate bubble for “Chihuahua”. Last I checked, sewer rats weren’t pets
Mike, Mike. Chill! Someday, everybody discovers the awesomeness that is Chuck Norris. Don’t ‘dis the younger generation for figuring out what we already know …
When did “awesomeness” get redefined to mean “retardation”?
In the brain of Literal, anything is possible, apparently.
When do people trying to act condescending and intelligent actually use legit words and in the proper context?
I think the set of things that Chuck Norris could kill you with is wrong. It should encompass the entire graph, and be provided with a footnote that the graph extends beyond the confines of the individuals monitor, but was reduced for the sake of this website.
Also, it should note that the footnote itself is included in the set.
Should be things Jack Bauer can use to kill you!
hehee
Surely this implies Chuck Norris could use yourself to kill you..?
a) chuck norris is always funny.
b) last year is funny.
c) chuck norris being “last year” is even funnier.
d) op forgot a circled labelled “you.”
I saw Chuck Norris in the Dixie Chicken in College Station, TX.
He’s a pretty cool guy.
All thse jokes were for vin disel first
….l-who-z-her…..get a life
I think Chuck Norris has already killed Nick.
chuck norris’s favorite facts
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Awesomeness!
To all Chuck Norris haters: Why look at this graph at all if you think it is “uncool” or “last year”? And why spend time commenting on it, when you could be doing something less hateful. And just to warn you: Chuck Norris hates trolls.
On a more cheerful note, here’s a quote from a Lemon Demon song, Ultimate Showdown:
“Angels sang out an immaculate chorus
Down from the heavens descended Chuck Norris”
Perfectly describes his epic-win-ness!
loser…you seriously need a roundhouse kick in the face!
Actually, I’d check out that site!
cuck norris needs nothing!!!
Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter.
Chuck norris is stuCOMMENT DELETED
Not MORE Chuck Norris jokes! Argh!!!